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Divorce! Do kids suffer?

Love lost and relations broken can spell disaster for children! Research has confirmed that kids suffer the most when their parents decide to walk separate directions. The figures are disturbing and the emotional disturbances are poignant and get profoundly settled in the minds of little kids. Children worship their parents as God, and they have a firm belief that their parents have magical powers. They firmly believe their parents can solve any issue in life with their experienced abilities to solve everything right away.

A divorce doesn’t mean that each child is definitely going to face trauma in life. Having seen their parents walk different paths, kids are known to have scored the perfect “10” in school and shine. They may have managed well but there are many kids who crumble at this huge change in their lives and they do find their parents’ divorce extremely difficult to handle.

Loss of security
The mention of the word divorce between the parents shakes the safety bubble the kids surround themselves with. After all they have always seen their parents together and now suddenly they have to imagine their lives without seeing one of them daily. Their security bag is destroyed with the knowledge that their parents do not love each other anymore and want to walk off from their marriage.

Fear of absence from life
The fundamental perceptive for kids in life, is togetherness. For them a divorced parent means “not present” for life. Emotional scars establish themselves tightly on the heart of the little innocent kids. The kids deeply regret the lost closeness, love and security that both their parents provided them.

Fall in grades
Disturbed children are known to show a fall in grades in school and their teachers claim to notice behavioral discrepancies.div

Juvenile Delinquency
There are children who have been recorded for juvenile delinquency because of an unhappy childhood. There have been children who have earned the tag of belligerent brats because of their lack of emotional attachments and attention seeking behavior.

It’s sad but Kids from separated families have also been shown to indulge in crimes and leaving their studies midway. Teenagers who see their parents separate, feel it below their dignity to give vent to their emotions and they may end up drinking, indulging in promiscuous sexual relations and may resort to substance abuse as well.

Financial distress and deprivation
The financial side of living also takes a jolt with divorce and the custodial parent realizes very soon that there is going to be a dip in income, which has to be managed somehow. This leads to the deprivation of luxuries in lives of many kids.

Physical and psychological Sickness in kids
Even medical science recognizes that kids belonging to broken families fall sick more frequently. Victims of child abuse have also disclosed a turbulent past. Psychological distress and an inability to handle issues without an emotional viewpoint can make life for youngsters very complicated to handle.

Instability and insecurity
Small children consider their parents as their favorite companions and they are hugely dependent on the emotional and physical care handed out to them by “mommy daddy”. The constant shuttling between two households and seeing other people flit through their parent’s bedrooms can cause distress in their life. Instability and insecurity can lead to erratic behavior in these young babies or they start to fantasize togetherness between the parents and live in a “dream world” detached from others.

Bed wetting and attitudinal changes
Kids have shown to resort to bed wetting, rebellious screaming, whining, crying before sleep, super anxious, throwing tantrums, and even losing self care skills in certain cases. Their attitude is an innocent cry for help and they need to connect to both their parents. Adolescents tend to become self-reliant in a good and bad way and the kids start to hang on at all times, this can be very nerve wracking for the care taker!

About Minnie Mahendru

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